中科新闻网书字部首是什么偏旁:请问各位朋友，这篇文章我总觉得有问题~~ 就是不知道~~
来源：百度文库 编辑：中科新闻网 时间：2024/05/06 02:48:38
SUMMARY OF QUALIFICATIONS:
Demonstrated ability in the provision of sales support services. Includes establishment of the client base, extensive customer servicing, telemarketing, cold calling and sales territory development.
Exceptional communication and interpersonal and organizational skills.
Aggressive, independent and be able to work under a dynamic environment. Have coordination skills, teamwork spirit. Studious nature and dedication are my greatest strengths.
一个简历，我总觉得出了好多问题。
请问，出了多少错误，应该怎么改？ （要能解释具体怎么错的，就好了！（语法解释））
SUMMARY OF QUALIFICATIONS: (去掉summary of，人家知道你不会把半岁以后就不尿床的事扯进来的）
Demonstrated（不适合用动词） ability in the provision of sales support services.（将这个句号改为逗号，后面的includes改为including小写） Includes establishment of the client base, extensive customer servicing（servicing不合适，改为service，（去掉逗号加and）telemarketing（加上expereince）, cold calling（cold calling （向潜在的主顾打的）冷不防电话！）and sales territory development（语义含糊，究竟想说什么）.
Exceptional（显得过于自吹了） communication and interpersonal（删掉and interpersonal，因为communication包括这点） and organizational（改用名词） skills.
Aggressive, independent and be（删掉be） able to work under a dynamic environment. Have（用having） coordination skills, teamwork spirit. Studious nature and dedication are my greatest strengths（不适合来一个完整的句子）。
第一段sales support services. Includes establishment 中services后改为逗号， Includes 改为INCLUDING
最后一段and be able ，把be删除，