泡沫堰板定义:高手请指点一下，自己写的一篇高中英语文章！满意者追加分数！

来源：百度文库编辑：中科新闻网时间：2024/04/30 21:34:32

Yesterday,together with some of my classmates,I went to the National Art Museum to attend a activity orgnized by our school,whose purpose was to improve the level of our cognition on modern art.There we saw a great deal of art works made by some famous or inglorious artists.Though this was the first time for us to see such a great exhibition,I knew art was so important that no one can cast it away from the role it is playing.Knowing art can not only develop out spirit in life,but can make our life more colourful as well.In a word, I like this activity very much and hope there will be more chances for us to experience the way art is going.

你的文章基本意思可以表达，但很多地方不符和英语表达习惯，不好说错但看着别扭，这也上大部分中学生的通病。我帮你修改了一下，在不损坏基本结构的情况下改了几个小地方，你可以对照一下。建议以后多写多看范文，背一些基本的句子，会有很大进步的。有什么不明白站内消息交流。（注：最后一句的后半句有问题，不知想表达什么也就没改了）

Yesterday,with some classmates,I went to the National Art Museum to attend a activity orgnized by our school,which purpose is raise the level of cognition of modern art.At the National Art Museum ,we saw a great deal of art works made by some famous or inglorious artists.Though this was the first time for us to see such a great exhibition,I knew art is so important that no one can cast it away from the role it is playing.Knowing arts not only figure the lofty moral stature of us,but also make our life rich and colorful .In a word, I like this activity very much and hope there will be more chances for us to experience the way art is going.

很好很好!太好啦(我都不知道你在写什么)

that no one (can) cast it away ------ (could)

语法上没有什么错误,但是你忽略拉几点.
1,单是一篇作文是看不出来什么的,需要的是题目要求,这样我才知道,你是不是每一个信息点都写到.要知道,高考,一个信息点2分.
2,你需要加强连接词的使用

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